Ugh! Boundaries Who Needs Them?

Something that I have not been good at is setting boundaries...What is a boundary? A boundary is when someone oversteps your wishes.  An example of this would be, You have a friend who ask you if they can come over.  You tell them no because you are sick.  They show up unannounced with some chicken noodle soup.  At first glance this seems innocent and you should feel thankful.  Instead you are annoyed. Why? It is because you don't feel good and you said no.  No means no right? The person who brought the soup probably does not even realized they crossed a boundary.  They in their minds eye was doing the right thing, well they are not. How to avoid this from happening is to be gentle but firm with them.  Hey, thanks for bringing the soup over, but next time please call first.  (even though they already had) Another thing you could say is, "I know you meant well but it is really important to me that you honor my wishes.  You don't need to go into a long explanation, keep it simple and emotion free,  You even might have to have this conversation with them a time or two.

  So with all this being said, I am learning to say no and mean it.  I am learning to say no and not feel guilty about it.  I am always the one who says no, then I feel guilty about less than two seconds later.  I then call the person up and turn my no to a yes.  Then I spend the next hour or so silently yelling at myself for being wishy washy.

I am also learning to not let other people manipulate me.  Meaning that I don't always have to change my plans to fit their last minute lack of planning.  Too be honest, I know I need to give grace and be flexible with my schedule.  You see in the past someone would ask me to do something, and I would rearrange my schedule to make what they needed done work.  In the process I would become frustrated and lose my peace on so many levels.  Lesson learned!  I don't have to rearrange everything to accommodate them.  All I need to say is sorry this does not work for me, I wish I could help. It is even okay to say something like, "If I would have had a little notice, I could have helped you".

One thing that needs to be done when you say no to someone, say it with a good attitude and grace. The nicer you say things the better it will be received.  If it is that "certain" person that keeps pushing your boundaries, you might have to have a come to Jesus meeting with them.  Basically let them know you value their friendship.  When they don't honor your boundaries it is putting a strain on it.  Gently and firmly explain how you feel.  The part of this conversation is to listen to their response.  I always tell my kids listen with your ears not your mouth.  One suggestion I would make, it to say a prayer with them before talking with them.  Yes, it might get intense for a minute, but hang in there hold your ground and just listen to them.  Understand they might not realize what they are doing.  Another thing I would always tell my kids, "If I don't know it is broken, I can't fix it".  Communication and understanding plays a huge rule when you are tackling hard conversations with those who are close to you.  I also suggest that you take the matter to the Lord before you talk with tthem.  Ask the Lord to show you ways in which you can be humble.  Ask the Lord ways in which you should change, and ask Him to help you stand your ground,  As always thanks for reading and letting me share, Just My 2cents, Missie

I AM

I would like to share with you a revelation that hit me like a ton of bricks.  This revelation came about this past Sunday as we sang the chorus to David Crowder's song I AM

I am,

Holding

 

on 

to You.

I am,

Holding

 on

 

to You

.

In the middle

 of the storm,

I am

 Holding 

on,

I am

As we sang the last word in the chorus the word I AM stood out like it never had before.  What is God to us?  He is the great I AM. In the past I always felt like I was reaching out and holding on to God with all that I had.  I see the song in a new light now!  It is God singing to us!! He is holding on to us in the middle of the storm.  He is reaching out to us!  He is saying I have you, I am in control, I will not let you go. When these thoughts hit me, I felt a sudden peace overcome me.  I for the first time really understood what He meant when He was holding on.  Take a minute and breath it all in, breath out then let God be in charge.  He after all is the great I AM.  Just my 2cents, Missie 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcXdIgEUsHg

Rest in His Presence

As I was worshiping in church today, the Lord gave me a word.  He does this sometimes, so this time I decided to write it down.  In that decision I made a promise to Him and myself that I would start writing His words as He speaks them to me.  Sometimes the words come with great urgency, because of this I am beginning to understand the importance behind them.  A lot of times they are for me, but I feel sometimes they might be for someone else as well.  Sometimes He will provide an image to go with what He is saying.  Here is today's...

The image is of a person walking thru the desert.  This person is lost, defeated, and tired.  They are looking searching for someone to bring them a sense of joy and a sense of peace.  In addition, they are looking for rest.

Then the Lord shows me water...His living water.  This  living water is endless and never dries.  Notice the greenery around it and notice the water fall flowing in to the water below.  The words He spoke to explain these images are:  Even though you are walking thru a dry water less land this is not the end or how I created life for you to be.  I created you to be an Overcomer!!  How you are to overcome is thru My Presence. Come drink from My living waters, I will fill you with a new joy and I will you with a new spirit. A new spirit will rise up in you, drink from my everlasting waters.  For I will and I able to sustain you.  Rest in My presence  relax and rest in My presence.  As you were created for My glory, I was created to help you overcome!  

As I share His words spoken to me, my prayer is that whomever reads this will be blessed with the intent of His words.  Life can gives us some serious blows, but we are not to take them alone.  We have an amazing Creator who died for us on the cross so that we may live. Rest in His presence and let Him help you be the Overcomer He created you to be...Just my 2cents, Missie

Inner Lion!! I found You!!

What I am about to share with you was a situation I was in that was hard for me.  At first glance it may seem like a bit of overacting on my part.  Yet as you read this see the importance of finding your personal lion...

I needed a school book for my next class.  I was not able to get my book, because the school needed a financial aid document that I was supposed to have provided a while back. When asked if I had the required document my response was no.  Then her response was I can’t give you the book until you have the document.  Right then and there everything was fine…Then the situation turned south.  You see there was another person in the room with us.  She proceeded to sarcastically express to me that I might as well blow school off because I dropped the ball in not getting all the needed information in.  To be honest it was probably not how she meant it, but that is how I took it.  Did you know life would be better sometimes if we did not let our emotions rule us?  In this moment that is exactly what was happening with me.  I was feeling guilty because I knew I had not done my part.  I was a little stressed because I needed the book for my class.  To top it off I was sensitive to the fact I thought she was being mean to mean.  My feelers were hurt.  I walked out of the room feeling ashamed.  Then something amazing started to happen inside of me.  As I walked closer to my classroom I felt a bold determination in my step.  I sat down at the computer with phone in hand and started the process of getting the required documents.  It was so easy to obtain I chastised myself for not doing it sooner.  At the same time a whisper turning into to a roaring told me that I needed to go back to the ladies and tell them how I felt.  I stood up on shaky legs and headed back to the office.  I knocked then entered the room, and in a quiet but firm voice I explained to them how I felt when I had left the room.  I acknowledged my wrongdoings and told them how hard it was for me to come forward and talk to them.  They both looked at me and smiled saying that they were sorry for what was said.  The one who had said it had a little bit of fire in her eyes, but she understood where I was coming from and said sorry. I feel this was a big step for me.  I normally would not have said something and moved on, but sometimes God prompts us to stand up for ourselves.  He awakens the inner lion in us to help us.  The key to remember is to stand up for you or for someone else with grace and dignity.  Do it in such a manner that brings respect and honor to all parties involved.  Just my 2cents~Missie  

Nelly episode one

Meet Nelly my son Jacob's cat.  She is so fun and sweet!  More episodes to come. :)

A Mother's Day Remembrance.

What you see portrayed in this picture is a love of two people.  They desperately want to share their love with the child of their own.  This has not happened, but they cling to the promise that God will someday provide.  In fact, they have experienced a loss of child before they were able to meet the little one.  With  Mother's Day approaching it is a reminder to my daughter of this loss.  Please take a moment to read her thoughts on this.

  Here is the link to her blog. http://jessjmercier.blogspot.com/2016/05/mothers-day-is-coming.html

   I ask you to take a moment and say a pray to all the mom's who have had experienced a loss of a child who was not born, or one that was taken before their time.

Listen...

Have you ever had a period in your life when you felt like no one was listening?  I have and to be honest with you it is so frustrating.  It even can be hurtful to you when you are trying to communicate a need or want, and you feel like you don't even exist.

 How about I back up a few steps and explain myself.  It was an amazing time of worship at church.  You could feel the presence of the Lord.  It was so refreshing like a cool glass of water on a sun parched day.  During the service a prayer was given, and we told to go before the Lord and ask Him to help us with anything that was keeping us from Him.  I laid some things down at the Cross and instantly He whispered in my soul that He was going to fight the battle for me.  I needed to relax and trust.  I felt a sense of peace come over me, one that I had not felt in a long time.  Like a warm gentle hug from your favorite person.  In grasped on the promise He gave for me and held it close to my heart.  I claimed the promise that God's word never returns void, and was reminded to put my trust in Him.  With every promise that God gives you the enemy is on the prowl to cancel.  To remind you that you are stupid and not worth anything.  Well, my friend these are lies and don't you dare believe them.  With all this being said I have been in a battle that I can't seem to overcome.  For every step forward I take I feel like that I am punched backwards a few hundred feet.  I have even spent time with the Lord crying out!! God!! You said to me, You promised me...Yes I have even uttered these words...WhY hAvE YOU left me???? The answer is He has not.  Did you noticed that I used the words I Have Been In a Battle...What I have done is taken God out of the battle and tried to fight it in my own strength.  He has not left me, I left Him.  I did not hold the promise He gave me about fighting my own battle as close as I thought I did.

Now as I try to grasp onto Him with all that I have, I take a moment and ponder what it means to listen to Him.  I imagine Him reaching down from the Heavens to me trying to wipe away my tears.  Waiting for me to let go and let Him take charge.  He gave me a promise and yearns to fulfill it.  I just need to take myself out of being in charge, and let Him be in control.  My friend it is no easy task to do.  I must admit I don't like it when I am not in  control.  Even worse if I can't fix the problem my whole world spins out of control. This is a feeling that I don't like at all.  Not on any level.  If you are like me in situations like these.  Take a deep breath, grab a cup of coffee, and go find a quiet place where you can talk to the Lord.  Ask Him to show how to listen to Him.  Ask Him to have patience, because you are a work in progress.  Ask Him to help you trust in Him and what He has to offer you. If you have trouble finding that quiet time put on some worship music, sit quietly, and sing to Him.  He is willing and waiting for you to come to Him.  Remember He does not leave us, we leave Him.  In the process we end up trying to do things in our strength.  Our Father has big strong shoulders for us to lean on and take refugee.  Try it you will find what you are looking for.  Just my 2cents, Missie

Trust

Here is a story of two amazing people,my  daughter and her husband.  On Christmas day they found out that they were expecting.  They kept the news to themselves, because they wanted to make sure, and and tell everyone when the time is right.  At 9 weeks, I get a text message from my daughter asking is if I was working.  I replied yes, and then she told me her and Justin would be stopping by my work.  They have a gift for me.  They came to my work, handed me a the gift said it was mine, but I could not keep it.  I opened it and it was a infant size BSU jersey.  Imagine my joy when I realized what this meant!!  Pure joy was on their face!! Then a test of my faith was given to me.

A few days ago I got the call...mom...the baby does not have a heart beat.  My world turned upside down.  I prayed with Jessica and just listened to what she had to say.  What makes this news so hard is that it is her second miscarriage.  When I had heard the news that they were pregnant, I knew God had been listening and answered my prayers.  Now I turn to Him and try not to ask why, but to let Him be in control.  I must admit it is not easy.  Right now my focus is on my daughter and making sure she is okay.  I do daily check ins and we talk, I ask how Justin is doing.  Her response is we are good, we are both grieving, and we are okay. I know God has a plan, and I have put my trust in Him.  Just know that if you are in a journey you are not alone...Just my 2cents...

Here is the link to Jessica's blog post about the baby.

http://jessjmercier.blogspot.com/2016/02/dear-baby.html